JESUIT NOVITIATE 1999

by Frank Savadera, SJ

March 16, 1999 (Tuesday)

Similar to how Jesus asked the crimpled man, today I felt Him asking me as well: “Do you want to be well?” (John 5: 1-16). Lord, give me the courage and the conviction to go through the painful path of healing myself … of making myself most pleasing to you and ridding my life of the scars and issues that keep me from giving more of myself to others. Allow me to turn my back from things that ordinarily cripple me, that keep me from obeying Your will.

Father, help me rise above my individual selfish concerns. Help me carry my own mat … that which can well represent my many personal struggles. Help me to walk again. Similar to how the crippled man walked as you command him, may I also discover the wellness that will give me the strength to proclaim Your name as truly my Saviour.

April 7, 1999 (Easter Wednesday)

Fr. Roly Bonoan passed away yesterday. May he rest in peace. He was supposed to be our retreat guide for our 8-day retreat. Heard he was in Baguio for the Villa when the unexpected happened. Not much news from our end. I’m praying for him. Olin was most devastated. Before hearing the news, I heard someone wailing inside the Oriental Chapel. They were very close, I supposed. Olin had every reason to feel truly sad. I am one with him, more so at this time.

Thank you! Thank you! Where do all these help come from? It’s simply amazing how people are more than willing to contribute something for our Area-G Medical Mission. I calledToyota, La Tondena, Eveready, some friends, Ma’am Carol, etc. and everyone seemed excited to be of help, to contribute something of worth. I answered the phone in the office and there was this Ching Escalante volunteering to donate medicines from Zuellig Pharma. Wow! I’ve realized that similar to how the Lord has called me to this life and how he continues to influence me to do good deeds, He remains steadfast … as well, in His promise of support. Truly, He doesn’t exist only in this sacred place we call the novitiate. Prior to even answering the phone and entertaining calls from all over, I can already be sure that God has already worked in the hearts of many. He has likewise called, touched and influenced the life of the other party at the other end of the line. Magnificent! I don’t think it’s all about our ‘coersive prodding’ for people to donate or contribute. It’s all about the God who knows the needs of the poor and who responds accordingly through others. I’d settle with that for the time being.

The experiences of the mission, the begging days and the medical mission teach me so much about my God … how generous and good-natured He can be … how much He knows the needs of His people. And if I ask others for help … embarassed as I am … I also know that the Lord will touch their hearts. I’ve seen how the poor need the help of others. God will help. Others will help because God will help.